Been a long while

It has been a long while since i blogged. Gosh! Where should I start again?

It had been 2 years since my wedding. Alhamdulillah, my marriage has been good so far. The only missing piece is a child of our own to complete our family. I am still waiting for the moment to be pregnant and bearing a child for us. We have been trying but I guess, He has other plans for us. And, I will wait patiently, insya-Allah.

Work...
I was promoted to a Team Manager and moved to head 2 teams now in a totally different environment. I am grateful for the blissful life Allah has given me.

I started wearing tudung for almost 2 years but took it off again due to severe hair loss. Guess, my vanity still overpowers anything else. Haha!

Family...
Many things happened. We fell out with our father. This time, it is almost permanent. I feel more peaceful when he is no longer part of our lives. I really mean it this time. We tried to make peace but he just didn't realise it. Well, that incident was the last straw. Even I, who was known to have the highest tolerance level and patience among the 3 of us, really blew off on that night.

Friends....
The gal friends I knew and thought were my closest and bestest, seems all to have faded away through thin air... And, the fact is, I don't even know why. Wished they would say but, I am only left with silence. For awhile, I pondered and pondered and could not understand why or what... But, my Hubby said... "No matter what, you still have me, your mum and your sisters, your family." I couldn't agree less. Your family (minus the father part), will always be with you through everything... I didn't miss the father part cos my mum fulfilled that part for me.

I made new friends but never managed to give my whole heart into it again. Maybe, I am afraid that they might abandon me just like the rest... Maybe, I had lost that trust or faith in real friendships. Don't get me wrong... I never hated those who left, but, just felt strange... I do hope that I could still be friends with them but it may not be the same again....

So, I still keep a little group of my really real friends with me who would still be there, even though with just a simple whatsapp message, SMS, FB comments.. My bestie, who is always there for me, my closest colleague who never fails to pat me on my shoulder and kept me sane.

I read a lot these days, since Hubby bought me the Kindle eBook. I am currently doing some homework to start an online business. Who know? I might stop working and do it full-time...


PS: I am sorry, if what is written here may hurt anyone... I am just penning my random thoughts and what I feel now.... A thousand apologies.